Category Archives: TV



My mom used to watch The Mike Douglas Show “religiously;” she thought he was “so handsome,” and “you know, I believe he’s also Catholic!!!” “But then he has “SUCH WEIRDOS” on his show, “I DON’T KNOW WHAT HE’S THINKING!!!” “That foul-mouthed Richard Pryor, and who is that freak with the Afro?” “And Zappa? Where is HE from?” “Don’t even get me started about Lennon – we should never have gotten you those Beatles records … you might have turned out normal.”

Thanks, mom, if you hadn’t gotten me those Beatles records, I might have turned out normal.





I think I’m cured from T.V.


Well, ok, not t.v. completely, like I had to watch Sons of Anarchy in its entirety, um, and that one about the blue speed…. Alright, let’s just say I’m cured from t.v. commercials. I’ve only been watching movies and t.v. shows from my laptop, and have been blessedly spared from all the xmas advertising this year, which can either piss me off or send me into a funk, in equal measures sometimes. Ahhhhh, I hate CHRISTMAS, let’s have a WAR ON IT!!!! YES!!! Or, oh, I miss my family, I miss Mom, booo hooo hoooo hooo hooo.

I admit it, I’m sort of weak. I blame it on the early days. Mom used to stick me in my playpen in front of the tube, the electronic babysitter, and I guess I’d be sitting there playing with my blocks and what-not during the programs (Mom would be watching her soaps while doing her ironing.) As soon as a commercial would come on, I’d put down whatever I was playing with and pull myself up and get all excited about whatever was on t.v….then go back to playing once the commercial was over. (I did this until age 8 – no, not really, that would be strange.)

tvThere used to be a commercial for the dish soap Lux Liquid (I wonder if that’s where Lux Interior got his name, hmmm.) In the Lux commercial, ostensibly you use just a couple of drops of the stuff and you get tons and tons of suds – they fill up the whole t.v. kitchen. Well when I was four, I decided to experiment, so I dumped a whole bottle of the lovely pink stuff in the sink and let ‘er rip. Yes, Mommy, it’s just like on t.v. it keeps sudsing and sudsing, I said to Mom. I remember how pleased she was.

Recently in our Mass Communications class we had one session where all we did was sing jingles from 60’s and 70’s commercials. Now what was weird is that the class varied greatly in ages, from twenty-somethings to us not-twenty-somethings, but we all knew the words to almost all of them. Just frikkin evil….

How else in the world would children in America be taught how to spell b.o.l.o.g.n.a.?